Limerick

With remorse, said a nun down in Flannery,
To a well preserved man at the tannery,
"I've taken my vow,
So I can't use it now -
Let's pickle it down at the cannery!"

(Alternate version)

Said a practical novice named Flannery,
To an amorous man at the cannery,
"I'll soon take my vow,
So I can't use it now,
But let's have it preserved at the tannery!"

--Shawna, Greg and Marla

Thursdays are for toilet paper

The following Haiku were written during the period of time that my 16 year old daughter was dating a boy who worked at the grocery store.


Stealthily mother
Creeps out from the hygiene aisle
On boyfriend's day off

What if he suspects
From products that we purchase
That we are mortal?

Why do we have that?
It's a decorative toilet
Isn't it novel?

Nothing happens here
That would need air freshener
To make it better

We do not excrete
The toilet paper you see
Is there for our guests

Inside our bowels
Where you make stinky, we make
Ice cream with sprinkles

thigh-ku

If they made a film
My thighs would look fabulous
While crushing Tokyo

--Marla

thigh-ku

like crash-test air bags
if only their padding could
bubble wrap my heart

--Marla

thigh-ku

What have you done here?
Worn the upper thighs right through!
Curse you, thighs. New jeans.

--Sharon

thigh-ku

Spring's storms coming soon,
Rolling thunder, crash and boom
Oh, that's just my thighs

--Sharon